Are You Prey for a Rapist? Part I of II

By Kellene Bishop

I’m going to share with you some traits that rape predators look for in an ideal target and how you can counter their efforts.  This is NOT an all inclusive summary, it’s merely a highlight of a few of the considerations I teach in my Women of Caliber self-defense course.  Understand that my pointing out a physical trait does not mean to say that you should alter your dress or hair, etc.  But you should indeed be sure that if you posses some of these traits that by arming yourself with the knowledge and the tools to successfully fend off an assault, you eliminate all odds of you being raped. 

  1. Photo c/o stalecoffee.blogspot.com/
    Photo c/o stalecoffee.blogspot.com/

    You are a target to a rapist if you have long hair, a pony tail, or some way for the psychopath to control the rest of your body by pulling your head.  If your hair can easily be grabbed, you pose as an ideal target.  Now, here are the facts of things.  I refuse to change my personal appearance just because there are scum bags out there.  I won’t let them intrude on my freedoms in this manner for one minute.  This is why I also exercise my freedom to be armed with a suitable firearm and other weapons that are easily accessible to me.  While they are pulling my hair, I’m pulling my firearm from my side or belly holster—end of story.  

  2. Your clothing makes an ideal target if it is easily removable.  Some rapists even carry scissors to aid them in this effort.  Again, dress as you will, but if you’re going to wear something that will pop off with the flick of a finger, I suggest you either quickly become a master sumo wrestler or you become familiar with flicking YOUR finger on a ready trigger. Also, keep in mind that involuntary nudity really disrupts a woman’s ability to think clearly.  Don’t worry though.  You don’t have to practice random acts of public nudity to become immune to this vulnerability.  Simply putting your mind through a legitimate mental exercise of what you will do if your clothes are violently removed from you is a HUGE asset.  Most women forbid themselves to even think of such a thing.  As a result, their mind turns off if it happens.  This is NOT what you want to have happen.  Stay focused on your rehearsed self-defense and determination and not on the spontaneous breach of modesty and you will very likely survive mostly unscathed.
  3. Photo c/o smarthome.com
    Photo c/o smarthome.com

    Do NOT disengage from your environment.  Rapists look for women who are on their cell phones, walking, loaded down with bags, etc.  Such women are typically disengaged from their surroundings.  Not only can you not afford such a state of cluelessness for your own safety, but you’re useless to helping others as well if you indulge in this manner.  This isn’t about being paranoid.  This is about being aware.  I never get into my car absentmindedly.  I carry my keys with my hand ready on the trigger of my red-dyed pepper spray.  I am aware and ready.  If I’m going to be on the cell phone, I’m still mindful of my surroundings—to the point that my friends and family ask that I call them back when I can be focused on THEIR conversation.  A quick chit chat is not worth my safety and they know and respect that.  I never go out to my car at night or walk the dogs mentally disengaged.  I’m particularly focused when I’m in a parking lot of ANY kind, day or night.  While most reported rapes occur between 3:00 a.m. to 7:30 a.m., it doesn’t diminish my level of awareness at high noon.  Any person aware of their surroundings also comes across as a confident, ready woman.  Shallow useless excuses of a man are always repulsed by such an image.  

  4. Remember, rapists are cowards.  They are specifically preying on what they deem to be an EASY target.  As such, the majority of them do NOT have a gun on them (only 2%). Of those that do carry a gun or any other kind of a weapon, they rarely expect to have to use it as they rarely expect a woman to be armed with anything more significant than a random right hook or pepper spray, let alone the knowledge, skill, and willingness to USE a weapon.  Statistically assailants will give up and flee when confronted with a determined fight.Do NOT fall for the ridiculous notion that submission is safer.  It’s not.  Even if you aren’t killed during a rape, do you really want to end up pregnant with the child of a rapist?  Do you really want to have to corrupt every intimate relationship you will have thereafter because of the rape?  Regardless of your moral standing, I assure you that a rape is NEVER just sex.  It’s violent.  It’s a nightmare that will take superhuman strength to heal from.  I’d much rather use my superhuman strength to prevent a rape than to have to heal from such an incident throughout the rest of my life—wouldn’t you?
  5. Photo c/o Getty Image
    Photo c/o Getty Image

    When you’re fighting for your life, 5 minutes can seem like forever.  One of the exercises I highly recommend you doing is to punch at a pillow, mattress, dummy, or punching bag non-stop with all the fiery will you can muster for an entire timed five minutes.  Keep the fighting at a high, fevered pace.  Work up to this if you have to.  Most women are not accustomed to such a workout.  Sure women can run for 6 miles without so much as a sweat, but fighting for their lives with arms and feet moving feverishly for 5 minutes is a whole other matter.

Part II of II in the “Are You Prey for a Rapist” series requires some specific instructions and some photos to aid in that effort.  So tune in tomorrow to learn of a highly effective exercise and defense method for you to use in rape prevention!

Copyright 2009 Kellene Bishop. All rights reserved.  You are welcome to repost this information so long as it is credited to Kellene Bishop.

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8 Responses

  1. Excellent posts!!! I was referred to your site by Conservative Scalawag.

  2. Wifey says pony tails and sweat pants are the things to avoid. As for the 5 minute fight thing that is a very interesting (and humbling) thing to try. However if you have ever watched a street fight they don’t last anywhere near that long. IMHO for actual training going full bore for maybe a minute makes more sense because at that point one way or another a fight has been over for 15 seconds or more.

    • Sweat pants, definitely. Where can you store the gun in such a case. The timing up to 12 minutes is based on criminal statistics. But you are right. It is humbling and a bit of an eye opener. However, very useful especially if more than one attacker is involved.

      • Oh and one more thing…I’l wear a ponytail if I darn well feel like it. I’m not about to let a criminal affect my hair style when it’s one of the most comfortable for me. I might as well let them win as to determine that. Thanks for your comments, Theo

  3. Approximately 2/3 of rapes were committed by someone known to the victim.
    73% of sexual assaults were perpetrated by a non-stranger.
    38% of rapists are a friend or acquaintance.
    28% are an intimate.
    7% are a relative.
    (rainn.org)

    How would you suggest women defend themselves in the majority of cases? Where they know the perpetrator, and none of the characteristics you pointed out are relevant! Don’t get me wrong, these are very helpful tips if ever attacked, by the 17%. I’m just curious to know!

    “Regardless of your moral standing, I assure you that a rape is NEVER just sex. It’s violent.”
    – Very true, it’s all about power & control- has nothing to do with sex at all!

    For more in depth traits about rapist, visit this link
    http://www.rainn.org/get-information/statistics/sexual-assault-offenders

    • the number one defense against rape for every woman in every situation is to be aware. Just because you know someone doesn’t mean you should put your brain on a time out. There are still signs to watch for.

  4. […] author put together a great two part article called “Are You Prey for a Rapist?”  The first article covers some of the basics about being aware and a less inviting target.  The second part covers […]

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